10

so i was making sandwich right?
set everything up;plates, mustard,mayo and tofurkey slices all in front of the toaster
throw the bread in the toaster and go play for a few minutes
i come back and assemble everything
bam spreadin' mayo
sphladaow squeezin' for muxtard
throw the slices on and sealed the deal with the other piece of toast
now since i'm a grown ass man i have to put all this stuff away
but since i was jonesin' to destroy this sandwich i hurried
put the slices back in the fridge
ran back and put the mayo lid on the pointy part of the mustard bottle and knocked it over
there's mustard on the counter now
good thing no one saw that....

9

i'm having lunch with friends

i got a veggie burger and fries

after a few bites i notice that some mustard/ketchup fell onto my finger

i grab a napkin and wipe my finger off but noticed it was very smooth and didnt get too much off

i look down and realized that i wiped my finger off with the extra lettuce that i left on my plate

the napkin was right next to it

good thing no one saw that...

8

i threw something into the clothes basket that didnt belong in there...i can't seem to remember what it was

good thing no one saw that

7

i woke up with a killer sore throat

i make my way to the kitchen to take medicine

i set it up

cup here, water is boiling for tea and aspirin is in my hands

i get a tea bag and throw it into the cup

but i heard a clinking noise and look in

i see three tablets of aspirin in there..

good thing no one saw that